My first contacts with Ex-JWs did not occur until ten years after the last time I walked out of a kingdom hall.
For me , a series of gradually accumulating private doubts led me to carry out some discreet research; such "research" as was available in the pre-internet era. That mainly came down to a very small number of books, such as WC Stevenson's 1975: A Year of Doom?, plus certain writings of David Reed. Talking about the effectiveness of an "aggressive" approach - one "apostate" book that failed to impress me was W. Schnell's 30 Years A Watchtower Slave. It somehow came over more as the rantings of somebody slightly unbalanced, rather than an informative work on the Jehovahs Witnesses. (Even WC Stevenson gave Schnell's work a negative mention).
My doubts really began with the failure of anything to happen in 1975, plus the official silence that followed it. However, not wanting to classed amongst the "quitters", I found ways to rationalise my way around that one (for a decade or two afterwards, anyway). As Morpheus aptly described it "Realizing and accepting are two different things". That was me, all-right!